PlanetNotion.com

Thieves steal gravestone of Ian Curtis!

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 12:02:50 GMT

The gravestone of Ian Curtis has been stolen from the Macclesfield cemetery where the Joy Division singer is buried.

The gravestone of Curtis, who committed suicide in 1980 at the age of 23, was inscribed with the words “Love Will Tear Us Apart” – Joy Division’s biggest-selling hit released a month before his death.

A police spokesman commented: “There is no CCTV in the area and there are no apparent leads as to who is responsible for the theft.

“This is a very unusual theft and I am confident that someone locally will have knowledge about who is responsible or where the memorial stone is at present”.

The popularity of Joy Division has grown over recent year’s following the release of Anton Corbijn’s Ian Curtis biopic, Control, and a recent documentary on the band.

I thought the the used tissue I snatched from Shaun Ryder was disgusting; but stealing the gravestone of one of post-punk's most iconic figures is bloody sick.

Fans have their say on Creamfields!

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 12:42:35 GMT

The UK’s Numero Uno dance-fest, Creamfields, has undertaken research to find out the best from the rest at this years festival.

Over 1000 people responded to a Creamfields survey, with questions ranging from where they’ll be spending most time at the festival to who they’re most looking forward to seeing.

Creamfields CEO, James Barton commented: “We’ve had an amazing response to the survey and it makes for interesting reading, I have to say. It also proves how vocal our customers are, which is great for us, as it gives us an opportunity to analyse the data and respond to it”

The results show that the majority of people will be travelling from the North-West, with 84% camping over the two-day period. Furthermore, DJ’s including Tiesto and Paul van Dyk are the main attraction, despite the inclusion of Ian Brown and Kasabian at this year’s 10th Anniversary event.

To win tickets to Creamfields, taking place from the 23rd - 24th August, visit the Planet Notion competitions page. For the festival line-up, updates, and the full results of the survey, visit the Creamfields website.

Lounge on the Farm announces fancy dress theme!

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 17:32:33 GMT

Somebody asked Planet Notion what we’d like to be if we could be anything in the world. It took Planet Notion a mere mili-second (sic) to come up with an answer… Catfish don’t have to worry about writing previews for dodgy House nights, or where that greasy white stain on their black jeans came from. Which is why we’re so excited that Lounge on the Farm (LOTF) has announced a fancy-dress theme for this year’s festival. Hoorah!

LOTF, taking place at Merton Farm, Canterbury, from 11th – 13th July, is calling for all attendees to dress-up based around the notion of ‘Farm-Hands’. This isn’t limited to mucky slacks, slicked mullets, and mothers who are your brothers; Oh no, LOTF is willing to accept country gent attire, milk-maids, two-man cow costumes – anything really!

Furthermore, the best costume will win the coveted ‘Best in Show’, given out by a really eccentric country dude. Um, you do get Catfish on farms don't you? Of the bands on offer, Mystery Jets, Holy Fuck, Dub Pistols Sound System, Lightspeed Champion, Los Campesinos, Polar Bear, Johnny Foreigner, Toddla T, Black Kids, Billy (friggin’) Childish, and The New York (fuckin’) Dolls will all be taking to the stage… Planet Notion has tickets to give away too: CLICK HERE TO ENTER! And for a full line-up and loads of other information on the festival, CLICK HERE!

Record sales boosted since Glastonbury festival!

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 11:20:43 GMT

One wonders how Noel Gallagher feels about the praise Jay-Z received for his Glastonbury set on Saturday, following the Oasis guitarists comments that hip hop has no place at the festival. It was probably a bigger kick in the teeth for Noel when the American rapper covered the Oasis classic ‘Wonderwall’, accompanied by guitarists and huge Union Jack backdrop, the crowd lapping it up like a pack of thirsty mongrels in a desert Oasis.

But today Noel will be patting the American rapper on the back, following news that sales of Oasis albums have seen a sudden resurgence since the festival ended.

According to the BBC, sales of 'What's The Story (Morning Glory)', the album featuring ‘Wonderwall’, as well as Oasis's best of album, 'Stop The Clocks', have increased by 200% and 140% respectively. The ‘Wonderwall’ single has also seen a boost in sales. But the Gallagher brothers aren’t the only ones to benefit.

Experts [whoever they may be] predict that Jay-Z’s 2004 single, ‘99 Problems’, will sky-rocket into the top 25 this week, with his Linkin Park collaboration, ‘Numb/Encore’, also expected to chart. Other bands to play at Glasto, including Elbow, Kings of Leon, Editors, The Feeling, and The Raconteurs, have also seen a massive boost in sales. [fini]

Tinie Tempah to support Jay-Z at O2 Wireless this Thursday!

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 15:30:14 GMT

19 year-old MC/Writer, Tinie Tempah, has been handed the Massive Task of supporting Jay-Z. Tempah will play alongside the American hip hop artist, whose set proved a big hit at Glastonbury, during a set at the O2 Wireless Festival this Thursday.

An indication of how quickly the UK artist’s reputation has grown in the 3 years he’s been releasing material, is the attention he's been getting from the press across America...

Independent releases on DL Records caught the attention of the New York Times’ Kelefa Sanneh, who wrote: ‘His nerve, shifting rhyme schemes and even his accent (“can’t throw” becomes “cahn’t fro”) might charm American listeners, providing they can find a way to buy or steal this pleasingly overstuffed CD.’

An interview alongside Gym Class Heroes in Playboy Magazine, and coverage throughout the states for his ‘audio scrapbook’, are just for starters. In good ol’ Blighty, Tinie, whose A Levels coincided with his increasing reputation, was picked as a representative for Youth Culture.

Mike Stobbie, the composer behind BMW, Marks & Spencer, and McDonalds commercials, produced the Tinie track, ‘Put the Knives and Guns Down’, whilst interviews with news channels such as ITN, BBC, and Sky, showed the country that there’s far more to the college graduate than quick lyrics and slick rhymes.

Currently mulling over his UCAS form, Tinie’s stature continues to grow; supporting Jay-Z further indication of just how highly the young artist is regarded on the urban music scene. New single, Tears, is released on download from the 4th August with a string of live dates to coincide. For further information, visit Tinie's MySpace!

Young Knives and Fun Lovin' Criminals among new acts for Beachdown!

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 12:32:09 GMT

The Beachdown Festival has announced a new string of top acts joining an already secure string of top acts, making for a really long string of top acts. The festival, taking place at Brighton’s Sand Downs over the August Bank Holiday of August 22nd to 25th, will bring together a whole friggin’ host of genre-bending names from the upper-echelons of the international circuit.

We’re talking the folksy strumming of Jose Gonzalez, the kings of hip-hop/rock, Fun Lovin’ Criminals, and geeky post-punk alt-rockers, The Young Knives. That’s just for starters, Bonobo, The Brakes, Peggy Sue and The Pirates, and USA favourites, The Magic Numbers, will also be making the trip to Sand Downs.

Good God, man, it doesn’t stop there! French collective, Nouvelle Vague, and NYC residents, Hercules and the Love Affair, will be joining the likes of the Maccabees, Lightspeed Champion, Reverend and the Makers, and the critically acclaimed Terry Callier. Other acts include Azymuth, Jah Wobble All-Stars, and Amp Fiddler.

Beachdown joins a long list of festivals attempting to "do their bit" for climate change; aiming to be as carbon neutral as possible and employing a number of energy saving and environmentally friendly tools. Furthermore, a weekend pass will set you back a mere £85. It's a deal, a steal, the sale of the fuc... For camping and ticket information, as well as updates to the line-up, visit www.beachdownfestival.com

Beardyman to host Get Loaded! Wiley among new acts announced!

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 16:37:02 GMT

Tickets for this year’s Get Loaded in the Park are selling like hash cakes. Little surprise when you take a glimpse over the line-up; a glittering, nay – blinding array of international artistes and DJs. Ahem, Iggy and the Stooges anyone? Utah Saints m’boy? Okay, how about a dose of Plastic Little? I could go on, and I will; but first, to the new additions and latest announcements for the August 24th event…

Get Loaded have confirmed that the host of the main stage will be one of the Legends of his art. Viewed widely as the greatest beatboxer (sic) to grace the scene, Beardyman will be taking to the stage with his own inimitable array of scat-sounds, beats and blips, courtesy of his amazing multi-instrumental vocal-chords!!! As far as Beatboxer’s go, Beardyman is easily ranked as the most entertaining - donning outfits, impersonating folk, and getting up to general tomfoolery. Imagine Joe Pasquale as a human synthesizer and you’re someway there. Actually, scrap that; that’s a taint on the good name of our Beardyman…

Of the acts, Wiley (yes, Wiley) will be making an appearance. Donned the ‘Godfather of Grime’, Wiley is one of the most respected artists of his ilk. The former Roll Deep rapper recently found chart success with the single ‘Wearing My Rolex’. I remember when he used to wear a Swatch, which is a clear indication of just how far he’s come…

Metronomy will also be bringing their wonky-electro pop to proceedings. The talents of the three-piece don’t end with their thoroughly enjoyable instrumental and electro combos; oh no, the boys are also a dab hand at remixing having taken on tracks by the likes of Roots Manuva, Klaxons, and Ladytron. They're also a darn impressive live act! Kid Harpoon will be supplying more subtle folksy numbers, having established himself as one of ‘08’s breakthrough acts, whilst genre-bending beat and blip-smith, Toddla T, and electro Aussie newboys, Midnight Juggernauts, make up the latest additions…

This year’s Get Loaded will be split into various stages hosted by XFM, Together/Timeout, and Finger Lickin’ Records, who will be celebrating their 10th Anniversary as only they know how: With a big phat mash-up verging on biblical proportions. The likes of Kate Nash, Soulwax, Mylo, The Hives, Ipso Facto, Streetlife DJs, Supergrass, Plump DJs, DJ Yoda, and Gogol Bordello will be spread, thick and juicy, across the Get Loaded stages… For line-ups, tickets, and all other information visit www.getloadedinthepark.com

UK to lead the way at Croatia's Garden Festival!

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 14:16:53 GMT

The Garden Festival (TGF) has become one of the best-loved dance festivals in Europe over recent years. The idyllic surroundings of Croation city Zadar on the stunning Adriatic coastline, and the intimate scale of the festival, has seen TGF attendees returning year after year since its induction onto the circuit five years ago…

Taking place from the 1st – 3rd of August, this years TGF has drafted in some of the finest promoters from the UK for what’s sure to be three days and nights of high-octane ear-beating action; and this on top of cutting edge international artists and underground club legends…

Kings of the East-London scene, Mulletover, renowned for their hedonistic warehouse parties and all-night rave-a-thons, will be heading to Zadar. Mulletover co-promoter, DJ Geddes, will be leading such charges as German tech/house god Matthias Tanzmann and East-London wideboy Jamie Jones.

Even Wales is getting in on the action, with soulful-house hosts, L’America, drafting in some of their best-loved DJs from around the globe. If house floats your boat, Saturday night’s the place to be, with DJ Rame (Italy’s Pasta Boys) and Slovenia’s DJ DEKKY joining Craig Bartlett and his L’America clubnight. Awooga!

Finally, East-London favourites, East Village, will be bringging a host of DJs, including Ame, Dixon, and of course East Village ledge Stuart Patterson, along for the ride. The city of Zadar has enjoyed a resurgence of chic cafés and bars over recent years, where punters can take a breather from the heady-hedonism, chill-out, and relax… Oh, and the icing on the cake, if ever I bleedin’ saw it, is the return of the infamous Argo cruise to a secret party location! SWEET!

For line-up updates, ticket information, and travel details visit www.thegardenfestival.eu

Mulletover

Matthias Tanzmann

Jamies Jones

Geddas

Saturday 2nd August:

L'America

Pasta Boys

Craig Bartlett

GarethHopkins

Claire Jones

Dave Little

DJ Aleksij

DJ Dekky

Sunday 3rd August:

EastVillage

Ame

Dixon

Stuart Patterson

The Daily Round-up: Thievery, Glitter, and Glasto!

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 18:26:57 GMT

Gary Glitter plans to release an album upon his release from a Vietnamese prison, it has been revealed. 64 year-old Gary, serving time for child abuse, revealed his plans to a state-run Vietnamese newspaper. What the former glam-rock star fails to understand is that NOBODY “wants to be in his gang” and they never bloody will!

Justin Timberlake has revealed to website Collider.com that he suffers from not one, but TWO conditions! Trousersnake reckons that he suffers from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). “Try living with that”, Trousersnake explained, “It’s complicated”.

Coldplay now have the number 1 album in America. Didn’t see that one coming.

Louis Walsh reckons Simon Cowell is after a bit of Cheryl Cole’s hot bod. Speaking to Reveal, the ex X-Factor judge said of veteran X-Factor judge Cowell and new X-Factor judge (phew) Cheryl: “Obviously Simon will be all over Cheryl like a rash; she’s absolutely stunning and a fantastic girl”. Doctor’s responded by saying that the Simon Cowell Rash is far less harmful than Genital Warts and Chlamydia.

Travellers to this years Glastonbury could be delayed after a fire broke out a mile outside the festival. Delays are widely expected on trains, and traffic is thought to be “a nightmare”. The odds of a catastrophe occurring at Glastonbury were a mere 2-1… And that was six months ago.

Kid Rock (he shagged Pamela Anderson and released records) has urged people to “steal everything” on internet site YouTube. The 37 year-old Kid told people that they should steal cars and iPods and Tommy Hilfiger clothing and his music; probably because nobody would bother listening to it otherwise… He later revealed the speech to be a great big silly joke. Hahahahahahahaha! (ahem)

The Kanye West "BREAKING DOWN THE WALLS" Bonnaroo rant!

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 13:21:21 GMT

Did you hear about Kanye West riling the festival going peeps at Tennessee’s Bonnaroo last week? In case you haven’t heard about it, we’ll fill in the blanks...

Planet Notion’s interpretation of the incident is thus: Kanye didn’t want to play on the ‘Which Stage’ (reserved for fairly good, non-headlining acts) so he was all like: “Screw that man”, and decided that he’d move himself into a slot on the ‘What Stage’ (the main stage) at 2.45am. So anyway, Kanye’s running dangerously late, something like 2 hours, so all the peeps in the crowd started throwing stuff onto the stage (beverages, chicken bones, nuts, cows; that kind of thing). When Kanye eventually appeared his set was apparently “pretty good” but, unsurprisingly, he was continually heckled throughout…

As you can imagine, Kanye’s received pretty bad press for his diva(esque) behaviour and, not one to take getting “dissed” lightly, has hit back through his online blog. “I understand if people don't like me because I like me or if people think tight clothes look gay or people say I run my mouth to much,” Kanye, who to our knowledge has never sported skinny-jeans, begins.

“But this Bonnaroo thing”, he continues, “Is the worst insult I've ever had in my life. This is the most offended I've ever been... this is the maddest I ever will be. I'm typing so fucking hard I might break my fucking Mac book Air!!!!!!!!”

He just though he’d drop that in…

"LIKE WAYNE SAYS PLEASE DON'T SHOOT ME DOWN CAUSE I'M FLYING! I'M FUCKING HURT BY THIS ONE', BONNAROO SHOULD HAVE RELEASED A STATEMENT IN MY DEFENSE BUT SINCE THEY HAVEN'T LET'S BREAK DOWN THE WALLS ON THIS TRUMAN SHOW AND LET YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY OCCURRED!!!"

Kanye’s so pissed-off he doesn’t realize he’s left caps-lock on. The man’s on a role!

"MY PEOPLE WORKED OUT A COMPROMISED STAGE PLOT AND A 3AM TIME SLOT AND I AGREED. FAST FOWARD TO THE DAY OF THE SHOW. MY PRODUCTION MANAGER TRIED TO LOAD IN FOR 24 HOURS BEFORE I WENT ON STAGE BUT THE FESTIVAL WOULDN'T ALLOW US TO DO ANYTHING UNTILL PEARL JAM LEFT THE STAGE. PEARL JAM ENDED ON HOUR LATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AT THAT POINT WE'RE RACING AGAINST THE SUN."

God-damn friggin’ Pearl Jam arse-munchers! What a bunch of turds, messing things up for Kanye like that. How can they live with themselves? HOW!? HOW!?

"I CUT A FEW SONGS FROM THE SET BECAUSE I WANTED PEOPLE 2 EXPERIENCE STRONGER WHILE THERE WAS STILL SOME DARKNESS TO PERFORM IT IN. I'VE STRUGGLED WITH STRONGER FROM IT'S CONCEPTION. REMEMBER LAST SUMMER WHEN I CANCELED SOME TV APPEARANCES. IT WAS BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO PERFORM STRONGER IN THE DAYTIME".

God-damn friggin’ daylight!

"SOMETIMES I GO 2, 3 DAYS W/O SLEEP WORKING ON MY PERFORMANCE...” Jesus, Kanye, you should take it easy man; treat yourself to a new Ferrari 612 P4/5 or one of those self-flushing ‘Buck Rogers’ toilets.

“I HAVE TO ICE MY KNEES AFTER EVERY SHOW AND THEY HURT WHEN I WALK THROUGH THE AIRPORT... HAVING AN EXPENSIVE STAGE CUTS MY PAYDAY IN HALF". And there was Planet Notion complaining about our minimum wage and mid-week comedowns.

We don’t realize how friggin' easy we’ve got it sometimes.

Nokia 'Music Almighty' is rolling into town!

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 10:12:17 GMT

Nokia’s ‘Music Almighty’ returns next month with a range of bands and DJs playing nine dates across the UK. Alas, this year the event will be a completely different ball game; well, not exactly a ball game, more a roller-disco extravaganza!

Celebrating the UK’s love of music, Nokia will be taking their ‘Music Almighty’ roller disco to London, Birmingham and Manchester, enabling 1,000 people to participate in the sport completely FREE of charge.

Like a neon-soaked scene from trippy 80’s film Xanadu, acts including Hot Chip, Zero 7, and the legendary Norman Jay will take centre stage as skaters weave between giant glitter balls, trees, and statues representing pop, rock, hip hop, electronica and classic anthems.

Will Harris, Nokia's Marketing Director commented: "Nokia Skate Almighty is going to be the event of the summer. As fun as ice-skating, but a lot warmer, it will bring people together [and] pay homage to the different types of music that we all love. With some of the best DJs around playing at the events it is going to look and sound absolutely fantastic."

Furthermore, the Nokia ‘Skate Almighty’ rink will be open to children and families during the day; so whether you’re an oatmeal-munching pensioner or a duplo-building kid, you’ll be able to keep fit in the coolest (and hottest) way possible.

The event will kick-off in the Thames-side South Bank area, London, from July 11th to 13th, before taking in Birmingham’s Victoria Square from July 18th to 20th, and Manchester from 25th to 27th.

Log on to www.nokia.co.uk/skatealmighty to secure a free ticket and a one-hour skate slot. Tickets will be sent to mobiles prior to the event.

In other news ‘Nokia: Music to Your Ears’ has signed-up hotly tipped newcomer Vassy; the songstress has recorded the Rolling Stones’ “Sympathy for the Devil” and the New Radicals’ “You Get What You Give”. Both will be available to download from the Nokia Music Store from July 10th. Visit www.music.nokia.co.uk for details.

The Daily Round-up: The FBI, McFly, and Boy George!

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 18:26:42 GMT

Kevin ‘God Knows How to Pronounce His Surname’ Skwerl, the guy who leaked Guns N’Roses’ 14 years in the making album, Chinese Democracy, is being questioned by the FBI. A keen blogger and former employee of the Universal Music Group, Kevin was questioned regarding the source of the files (tracks) he uploaded onto his website.

Speaking to Rollingstone.com, Kevin commented: “It's a legal grey area since it wasn't for download, it wasn't a finished product. We aren't sure who owns the recordings. I feel like I might survive this”. Sure, I mean a guy who spends all day writing shit on the internet and used to have a well-paid job is really going to beat Guns N’Roses, right? (ahem)

McFly are to give away their new album with the Mail on Sunday [fini]…

Boy George has thrown a massive hissy fit and said: “If the USA doesn’t want me then Canada can’t have me either” (there’s no evidence to suggest that George actually said this). George is punishing the Canadian’s, by refusing to tour, after the American’s denied him a visa due to a previous drug conviction. George was forced to serve a community order and clean filth off the pavements with the rest of the convicts and street-cleaners... Canadian's have apparently announced the 25th of July a public holiday...

Layo & Bushwacka! set release date for summer dance hit Celebrare!

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 10:57:41 GMT

Dance-double act Layo & Bushwacka! have remixed the Peter Raeburn classic ‘Celebrare’, the musical score that accompanied the Smirnoff Sea TV advert, one of the most watched on internet site YouTube.

The remix draws on classical elements, including a Bulgarian choir, a New-York based gypsy-punk band, and Scottish renaissance singers; along with melodic Latin vocals, harps, violins, huge double basses, and a deep and heavy bassline, Layo & Bushwacka’s! interpretation of ‘Celebrare’ is one of the most unique dance tracks of the summer.

The track is already taking dancefloors, the world over, by storm, having been road-tested in Miami, Sydney, and of course The End; the club co-owned by Layo where the pair regularly DJ.

As with the Raeburn original the track opens with a string intro, a building bassline added to the mix, before breaking into Raeburn’s euphoric Latin vocal. The usual Layo & Bushwacka! tech-house beats follow a cinematic mix of rising strings and chanting vocals, keeping a balance between Raeburn and co-producer Nick Foster’s original, and the dance-duos own interpretation.

Music producer Raeburn, whose work includes the musical score on Jonathon Glazer's film Sexy Beast, and original co-producer Nick Foster worked closely with Layo & Bushwacka! on the track, due for release on July 14th. ‘Celebrare’ will be available on CD and download formats, including beatport and iTunes. Furthermore, fans will be able to create their own visual interpretations to the music, just like the Smirnoff Sea advert (below), on internet site U-MYX.

For further information visit: www.layoandbushwacka.com

The Daily Round-up: Porn, Toy-boys, and Stomach ops!

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 18:40:51 GMT

Heather Mills has got her claws (leg/teeth/enter body item here) into a new fella. Yep, the 40-year-old former wife of Sir Paul McCartney met her 36-year-old ‘toy-boy’ in Tenerife, according to The News of The World.

“I'm under strict instructions not to talk about this,” Mills told the Sunday paper, “But I guess you already know it all then. Just be nice about me”. Which is a bit like telling Osama Bin Laden to come out of hiding for a game of British Bulldog and a slumber party at the White House.

Robbie Williams has reportedly been offered £1.5million to play a 30-minute set at a festival in Norway. Possibly because everyone thought Robbie’s last album, Rudebox, was (ahem) crap, the singer had vowed to give-up touring.

A ‘friend’ commented: “It would probably be the easiest money he’ll make in his life but it’s touch and go whether he’ll say yes. We’ll have to wait and see”.

Sad news today as a spokesman revealed Dame Shirley Bassey has pulled out of the Nelson Mandela 46664 concert this Friday. The great Dame had an emergency stomach operation and will take some time to reach full recovery. Following a blinding set at last years Glasto, we wish Dame Shirley our best wishes; you will be missed… That’s assuming she’s one of the 50 people who bother to read this.

Mark Ronson put the age-old question of whether he used to watch porn with Michael Jackson to bed, as he joined Justin Lee-Collins and Alan Carr on the Sunday Night project. Apparently, he and John Lennon’s son Sean, showed Jackson porn when they were youngsters.

"Me and Sean said 'Michael do you want to see something cool?'” Ronson explained. “We turned the dial to the porn channel and there were strippers shaking their tits around. We were like, 'Michael, Michael how cool is this?'”

And how did Jackson respond? "We turned around and he was cringing saying, 'Ooh stop it, stop it, ooh it's so silly.' He was not down with the program whatsoever”. Well Mark, that’s one way of putting it.

The Weekend Round-up: Emphysema, furniture love, and more!

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 11:33:01 GMT

Good grief! I wish Chris Martin would stop surprising me like that; I almost had a heart-attack. Coldplay have reached number one (1) on the American Billboard Top 100 Singles chart, the first British band to do so since the Spice Girls 10 years ago; and I really didn’t see it coming. Honestly, I didn't. Look, I'm being serious; I’m genuinely shocked.

Staind have announced a new album and tour. You remember Staind, right? They were the kings of teen-angst in like, 2001. They were so good at banging out nu-metal hits, that nobody noticed they couldn’t spell their name.

Anyway, frontman Aaron Lewis commented:“We went into the studio with the mindset of making our heaviest record yet, but the record that came out has flavors of Pink Floyd”. Which basically means: “We failed”.

Amy Winehouse has been diagnosed with emphysema, according to her father Mitch. Speaking to the Sunday Mirror, Mitch commented: "She's got emphysema. It's in its early stages, but had it gone on for another month they painted a very vivid picture of her sitting there like an old person with [an oxygen] mask on her face struggling to breathe".

According to Mitch, recent shows in Moscow and Portugal have helped sustain Amy from taking her usual cocktail of narcs, and doctors have suggested no reason why she shouldn’t play Glastonbury this coming weekend.

Primal Scream played an intimate London show in the early hours of Sunday morning to promote their forthcoming album, Beautiful Future. In a bizarre twist, pint-sized bassist Mani paid tribute to Swedish furniture giant Ikea. The forthcoming album contains a cover of the Fleetwood Mac song ‘Over and Over’, and the new tracks reportedly went down a storm.

Coldplay under attack for plagiarism!

Fri, 20 Jun 2008 10:51:12 GMT

Chris Martin and his merry-men were flying high; not on Red Bull or Coke or anything, but on the success of their new album: ‘Viva La Vida’ or ‘Death and All His Friends’. Yep, it’s sold something like a zillion copies (guess) and went straight to No. 1 (true).

Then suddenly an American band that few have heard of, Creaky Boards, threw a banana skin into the works with news that they have a song that sounds exactly (sic) like the title track of Coldplay’s new album. Yep, Coldplay are under attack for plagiarism!

Creaky Boards frontman Andrew reckons the band spotted Chris jumping about in the crowd at a gig in 2007 and that he was getting “really into it”. Apparently, he was so impressed that he nicked the tune to a Creaky Boards track titled…‘The Song They Didn’t Write’. You couldn’t make it up!

Nick Sunderland

Fri, 30 May 2008 16:35:18 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: Nick Sunderland (Vocals/Guitar)

Stomping Ground: East London.

Set to Soundtrack: Love… Loss… Hope…

Destined to Upset: The clubbing fraternity.

You’re in business if you like: Peri-Peri Chicken style Indie-Rock. Soft, but with a kick.

Imagine going for a leisurely run through the woods whilst listening to your I-pod; some gentle Indie-rock beating slowly against your drums. Suddenly there’s a kick, a harder edge to the music, and you pick up the pace. You’re really working it now; your armpits are rising damp and your brow’s getting wet - until suddenly you stop with a jolt to admire an unusual looking specimen! It’s a Liberty Cap: A Magic Mushroom. It looks tasty, and you’re feeling a wee bit peckish, so you take a bite… Oh god! Minutes later you’re on a crazy paranoid trip, peculiar voices infiltrating East-End artist Nick Sunderland on your I-Pod, as he explores deep themes of love and loss; loss and love. You’re running through the woods in a blind panic, arms flailing like an irate gibbon, the trees closing in on you like some paranoid delusion of Edgar Allan Poe. Memories of lost relationships are flooding back to haunt you, like an outer-body experience on a journey to the fiery gates of hell. There’s a bitter edge to Nick Sunderland’s music and lyrics, occasionally interrupted by the schizophrenic voice of inner thoughts and times that were. Sunderland explores subjects more at home within the softer realms of Indie-rock; albeit with a little more panache. By adding distorted electronic-infused vocals as a response to the lyrical context, on top of far edgier guitar solos, he explores the demented side of break-ups and the eternal search for love. Far from being depressing it kicks your sorry arse into gear; tells you to drop that quart of Whiskey and put down the sharpened knife. After all, break-ups and love are rarely lardy-dar (sic); they’re a subject that’s supposed to be approached with edginess and bite. Perhaps that’s why the London artist reached number two (2) in Metro’s singles of the week… Sure, Sunderland may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but he’s a damn sight better than the current crop of soft-Indie rockers littering jukeboxes nationwide, for single drunks to listen to whilst weeping into pints. Check out his MySpace! Words: Dangerous

The Power Lords

Fri, 02 May 2008 18:24:37 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: The Power Lords (Pierre and Bohdan)

Stomping Ground: South of France (St. Tropez) and the Ukraine.

Set to Soundtrack: Clubs where people sport Croydon facelifts and neck Bacardi Breezers.

Destined to Upset: Anyone without a sense of humour.

You’re in business if you like: Regular trips to the Krakow club scene.

“Let my weiner fire your hummer / Start in the cupboard later the freezer / Ask Boris Becker I’m a grand slam winner.” The Power Lords (Lords of the String)

The Power Lords have burst onto the club scene like a teenager on his first gram of cheap whizz; garnering reactions of befuddlement, guilty pleasure and disdain in equal measure. They’re the kind of Euro-techno outfit you’d imagine four fat birds in Benidorm doing ‘big square, little square, cardboard box’ to whilst taking the occasional glug of their Lambrini and pawing over a Spanish hunk - topless but for a dickie-bowtie. We’re talking cheese-smeared, holiday-camp cabaret, only a hell of a lot more polished and with a back-story that makes Star Wars episodes I-III look as dire as Series 4 of Deep Space Nine. The Power Lords’ story started as a dream of two playboy London Hedge Funders living it large in St. Tropez, a mutual love of European Techno inspiring them to have a pop in the music production game. James Burrell, a young composer and songwriter whose résumé includes work for the BBC, Nickelodeon and John Lewis was recruited to help the dream become a reality. Alas, with the playboy Hedge Funders jobs requiring a certain je ne sais quois -“Oh so respectful” - public image, the notorious twosome’s elation soon turned to concern. Having their names attached to a Euro-Tech song deep-set around the ‘St. Tropez G-String’ was hardly going to preserve the respect they’d worked so hard to build, right? Alas, the two pulled out, expecting an end to the whole shebang, but with the wheels set in motion James felt that the “show must go on.” And so the story ends. Well, you could say “And so the story begins” because the national press are lapping The Power Lords up like the Cheshire Cat with a bowl of Jersey’s finest. The Power Lords backstory is one of intrigue and mystery with more questions than answers and this is what makes them perfect fodder for the pad and pen. Debut single Lords of the String is going to be bigger than King Kong’s crown jewels and reading The Power Lords philosophy on music it’s easy to see why: “We love dance music that make you want to dance! Laugh! Kiss! Cry! Make Love too!!!” their MySpace beams. If that’s not the talk of global superstars I’ll eat my St. Tropez G-string and lick King Kong’s bellend! Check out their MySpace! Words: Dangerous Dave Dryden

Jay Reatard

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 11:15:40 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: Jay Reatard (vocals, guitar, bass), Billy Hayes (drums), Stephen Pope (bass)

Stomping Ground: Memphis, Tennessee since 1998.

Set to Soundtrack: A ketamine and whizz binge.

Destined to Upset: Fans of Happy Hardcore.

You’re in business if you like: Raucous full-throttle punk-dipped rock with a pinch of new wave.

Sometimes an artist will come along and kick you in the balls with such ferocity they go flying through your system and drop out your mouth; before sliding back to their rightful position, intact and twice as big and brutal as before. Jay Reatard is one such artist; his short, sharp, hook-laden tracks triggering an “I’m not gonna take this shit anymore” attitude - only way more successfully than heavy-metal (which isn‘t difficult). Jay began writing songs alone in his bedroom due to an overwhelming sense of boredom and a turbulent home life. He was recognized at the tender age of 15 after sending a demo tape to Goner Records and dropping out of school - which ultimately proved a wise move. Jay produces the kind of music that grips one shoulder tightly and slaps you round the face with a free hand – with lyrics that delve into everything from inner demons and a crap childhood to romance past and drinking piss from a jar… Take ‘Not a Substitute’ from Jay’s ‘Blood Visions’ LP which at 1:04 minutes long contains the simple lyrics “It’s not a substitute / not a substitute for you” before launching into a full-throttle guitar chorus of “MISSING YOU” like a skipping record that you daren’t change. Quite what the substitute for a lost love is remains unclear. It could be drugs, it could be a new missus, and it could be a chocolate bar. The fact is Jay leaves these small details for your interpretation. Jay used to be in punk-band The Reatards, alternating between singing, guitar, and a bucket for percussion. He then created/joined a few other bands, including Lost Sounds, before finally launching his solo career. An initially surprised music press have generally lavished praise on Jay’s first and only solo LP ‘Blood Visions’ which contains a full-throttle 15 tracks at under 30 minutes long. Anyhow, if you’re after punk-rock with the occasional Adam Ant new-wave eccentricity thrown in, Jay’s as good a bet as any… Check out his MySpace.

The Parlotones

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 15:30:04 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: The Parlotones - Kahn Morbee (vocals and guitar) Neil Pauw (Drums) Paul Hodgson (guitar) Glenn Hodgson (bass and keyboards)

Stomping Ground: London and Johannesburg since 1998.

Set to Soundtrack: Plucking up the courage to approach that girl/boy but never quite succeeding.

Destined to Upset: People who HATE teenage rom-coms.

You’re in business if you like: Melodious rock with vocals like the guy from Linkin Park - only better!

For a band that released their first album in 2003 and started up in ‘98 it seems strange that, if mentioned, The Parlotones garner the following response: “Who?” Or, with this section of Planet Notion being named a certain something: “Who the fuck?” But the South African four-piece have obviously been doing something right because in 2006 Universal Records snapped ‘em up. And it doesn’t stop there. FHM used The Parlotones single ‘Overexposed’ as the soundtrack to their ‘World’s Hottest Woman’ film. With lyrics that go a little something like: “This could be the end of - ‘Who the hell cares?’” it seems a bizarre choice for a film predominantly flesh and thigh. That’s until you hear a peculiar purring akin to the Cheshire Cat on five E’s and a Viagra. As far as sound goes The Parlotones appear to be a band unconfined by boundaries. Vocally they’re consistent, but musically it varies from jangly, up-lifting melodies, to heavy(er) guitar laden rock. As one would expect from a South African “rock band” The Parlotones are pretty bloody big in their native country and that popularity is fast spreading. Perhaps it has something to do with using a megaphone on stage? The band recently announced a European and South African tour which will see them playing Switzerland’s biggest indoor music festival, ‘Bscene’, and London’s legendary 100 Club. Sure, singer Kahn Morbee sounds a bit like that guy from Linkin Park, whose mainstream “nu-metal” whine appeals as much as a night in the sack with Lisa Riley and a dodgy kebab, but it’s kind of cool… Well, a hell of a lot cooler than Linkin Park, a damn sight tastier than Lisa Riley, and guaranteed to soundtrack a teen rom-com sometime in the future. I’ll put my money on it! Check them out: www.myspace.com/theparlotones

The Parlotones release new album ‘Radiocontrolledrobot’ on May 5th.

Hungover Stuntmen

Mon, 21 Apr 2008 14:45:25 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: Hungover Stuntmen - James Haselhurst (guitars/vox) Craig Oxberry (drums/vox) Iain Anderson (bass/vox) Stu Ridley (guitars/vox)

Stomping Ground: Newcastle Upon Tyne.

Set to Soundtrack: Pre-match drinks down a good old fashioned boozer.

Destined to Upset: Those who'd rather a night in with slippers, a cheap cigar and Ella Fitzgerald than a pint, a sing-song and Sky Sports News.

You’re in business if you like: British Indie rock.

Armed with custom guitars, you know, Rickenbackers, Telecasters and the like; Hungover Stuntmen have been dubbed “just awesome” by (who else) Zane Lowe. Surprising when you consider that they’ve only ever released standard demos. Yet despite their relative obscurity it seems the world is going crazy for the Geordie quartet. Take Yu Kamidozono, a Japanese fan who made a whopping 11,526.52 mile round trip to see the lads perform in London; my god, they have stalkers already! “They can play, sing, I’ve even seen them dance, and for sure they put on one hell of a show”, beamed Duran Duran’s Andy Taylor; you know, the guitarist with the bloated face? Sure, Andy’s bound to be a little biased, having produced the Stuntmen’s debut album ‘Blame it on the BBC’. But then, the rave reviews don’t end there. Suggs described the Stuntmen as “f**king great” and Paul Weller’s such a fan he allowed the boys to join him on stage. Twice! We say “allowed to join him” because the Modfather is so revered by Indie bands; they look up and aspire to be him like Eros, god of love, sex and lust. In fact, the Stuntmen have joined everyone on stage from Jools Holland and The Futureheads to, um… The Kooks and Get Cape, Wear Cape, Fly; taking time to play Ibiza Rocks in the process. In a nutshell, people are standing up and taking notice of these Indie rockers. Sure, there are always going to be those that say “Oh god, not another Indie guitar band”, but something tells us these lads are a tad more special than the usual bunch. Catchy, occasionally raw and well constructed? “Way-ey man!”

The Hungover Stuntmen’s debut album ‘Blame it on the BBC’ is released on 28th April.

The Steeples

Mon, 07 Apr 2008 12:42:17 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: The Steeples - Andy Culshaw (vocals), Dan Rankin (guitar), Chris ‘Hutchy’ Hutchinson (bass), Alex Caskie (drums)

Stomping Ground: Ormskirk (near Liverpool)

Set to Soundtrack: The NHS anti-smoking advert. Sorry, what’s that? They’ve done that already? Oh! Apparently they’ve done that already.

Destined to Upset: Eddie would hate them! You know; that dude from Iron Maiden?

You’re in business if you like: Jig-enticing pop-guitar and a voice like that bloke from the Kooks… Only with a bit more range.

Like that fit bird from the Sugababes, bands seem to be appearing from nowhere these days. They thought we wouldn’t notice that Mutya had gone AWOL and been replaced by Amelle Berrabah, but we all saw through it; you can’t fool me! Hailing from Ormskirk, which is near Liverpool, The Steeples are one such band; the kind that find themselves thrust into the spotlight and hailed “New Indie darlings” before they’ve had time to finish their Munch Bunch, pick their nose and press record for the latest episode of Poddington Peas. In a nut-shell The Steeples emerged from the wilderness and found a whole host of press and radio bigwigs getting hot under the collar; cum dripping down their thighs, salivating, and emitting groans of pure unadulterated ecstasy at these fresh new kids and their guitar-hook laden merry Indie-pop. XFM labeled debut single Britney’s Tears as “Ace;” The Daily Record used such phrases as “quirky” and “brilliant;” FutureSounds yelped “non-stop fun”. Alas, thanks to major radio plugging and frequently smitten reviews, The Steeples found themselves at the centre of a scandal... Well, we made that up; but they do have a band of followers that call themselves the ‘Steeple People’ which, in our opinion, has all the makings of a Manson style cult. Blending witty lyrical tales with pop-guitar riffs to create melodies stained with the butter drips of Indie sweetness, we at Planet Notion expect these guys to be a commercial success. That doesn’t necessarily mean we like ‘em or don’t like ‘em, it just means they’ll probably be huge because they remind us of the (ahem) Kooks. Loads of young whippersnappers love the Kooks (honest they do) and buy their records so they’ll probably do the same for The Steeples. And they’re pretty lads like the Kooks and… erm… Pass me the shovel! Please!? Check out their MySpace!

The Steeples debut album, Tea for Two, is released on Easy Money Records on June 16th following the release of single, Loosy Lucy, on June 9th.

Tilt City Ghosts

Thu, 03 Apr 2008 13:35:43 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: Tilt City Ghosts - Nick Bovaird (vocals), Matt Povey (bass), Anthony Hull (guitar),
Jon Lamont (drums)

Stomping Ground: Anywhere in London…

Set to Soundtrack: Aimlessly wandering at three in the morning; silently weeping and chugging a bottle of Castillo de Diablo after failing to pull in that grotty pub.

Destined to Upset: Well, they say they’re ROCK, but…

You’re in business if you like: Emotional lyrics minus the emo squeal, drum intros, and the occasional gritty guitar lick thrown in for good measure!

Bit of a funny one this. Don’t really know an awful lot about them, which is probably why they’ve ended up on ‘Who the Fuck?’ Any-hoo, let’s start with the basics. Tilt City Ghosts are four lads from London. They say they’re not “clowns” for our “amusement”, which means they’re a band with high expectations and want to be taken seriously. They also claim to have “hundreds of songs smeared across different styles and speeds” which means they’re a pretty eclectic bunch. We’re told they have a ballad in stark contrast to their manly lyrics (drinking and the like) which means they have mass appeal to all creeds and genders. They’re also “vibrant, changing and worthy of your belief” (their words not ours) which could be taken in one of two ways: Either they’re a bunch of egocentric wankers or they have an aching desire to be loved. We don’t think Tilt City Ghosts are wankers because they like things like fine art and old vinyl and batman and green tea; whereas people who drink 'Frosty Jack' on park benches and throw stones at the Old Peoples Home have never heard of green tea and use “batman” as a homophobic insult… Anyway, the bands music ranges from “drinking red wine in an empty room and reminiscing about a former love” type stuff to post-punk fuelled Indie anthems. If the combined forces of drink and music seem appealing, whether on your own or in a room full of people, then you’ll probably like the music of Tilt City Ghosts and their surprisingly deep lyrics. Check out their MySpace!

Ungdomskulen

Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:34:09 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: Ungdomskulen - Kristian Stockhaus (vocals/guitar), Øyvind Solheim (drums), Frode Kvinge Flatland (bass)

Stomping Ground: Bergen, Norway since 2000.

Set to Soundtrack: Getting locked in a cupboard with a Sega Megadrive and a television set from the 1980s.

Destined to Upset: Those who sit in fields, drinking milk, chewing straw and strumming an acoustic.

You’re in business if you like: Fast and furious rock that doesn’t take itself too seriously.

Ungdomskulen means ‘youth school’ in English which goes someway to understanding the band’s (seriously cool) delinquent sound. When we say delinquent, we don’t mean it in a bad way. It’s not like the opening credits of the ‘Clangers’ or ‘Teenage Turtles’ rap, its rock with a hard-edged innocence; like a fat kid given three-months in Borstal for nicking a pen-knife, just so he could chop up an apple as part of his healthy diet routine. It’s music undefined by boundaries, breaking limitations, and packing a punch outside the box. Anyway, the Norwegian threesome formed in 2000 with a sound made solely of guitar, bass, drum and vocals. They originally called themselves ‘Standing Ovation’ but, realising they were probably being a little optimistic, changed their name to ‘Goddammit’ (probably because they were pissed with not getting a standing ovation). Then they settled on the whole ‘Youth School’ shebang which represents that period of transition from boy to man. The lads have played in places like America and are shortly making a return to ‘Blighty’ for an upcoming tour with the Young Knives. Ungdomskulen also have new single ‘Modern Drummer’ coming out soon with a really cool and trippy video. Imagine being stuck in a computer game with a guy that looks like a bear, firing at aliens with groovy guitar licks while his mate bangs the drums like a nutcase and a bass player covers his back on a backdrop of psychedelic colours and crunching sound, and you’re only halfway there. ‘Modern Drummer’ is an ode to the drummer and the way that gadgets are taking over his role and stuff and how, like, that’s not a good thing because nobody can play the drum like the fucking drummer, right?! Ungdomskulen: Three crazy Norwegians pounding out funky, furious, fast-paced rock that addresses subjects that truly matter. Check out their MySpace! Words: Dave Dryden

Ashley Alexandra Dupre

Thu, 20 Mar 2008 14:10:44 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: Ashley Alexandra Dupre (AKA Kristen)

Stomping Ground: She’s been about a bit… Recorded first demo in 2004.

Set to Soundtrack: You know that scene in American Pie where the geeky guy is seduced by the MILF and they romp on a Pool Table? That!

Destined to Upset: Ex-Governor of New York Eliot Spitzer.

You’re in business if you like: Raunchy R‘n’B poured from a kettle with a crusty filter.

Few positives can be taken from Eliot Spitzer’s resignation as Governor of New York, following his association with a prostitution ring; except maybe the odd STI (evidence pending). But from the blood, sweat, tears and carnage an angel has emerged to bless all with her sweet-sounding R‘n’B. In fact, there’s nothing sweet about it, it’s as raunchy as Act 1 Scene 4 of ‘Throbin Hood Prince of Beaves’. Ashley Alexandra Dupre otherwise known as Kristen, the prostitute behind the Spitzer scandal, started her singing ambition when she moved in with a ‘musician’ during her ‘odyssey’ to New York. Like all budding singers Dupre was singing ‘Respect’ in the shower when (as she herself describes) “he and his lead guitarist burst in [and] had me repeat [it]”. Anyway, Dupre got caught up in drugs and was broke and homeless when she arrived in Manhattan only to find breaking into the music scene easier said then done. Sadly she became a call girl. Since Spitzer was exposed the R‘n’Wannabe has become an overnight sensation. Dupre released her first song ‘Can You Handle Me, Boy?’ as a free download on website Amie Street and due to her vocal skills (and in no way related to the Spitzer scandal) the song became a huge hit and a remixer’s wet-dream. Now Dupre has released both her second single ‘Move Ya Body’ and ‘Can You Handle Me, Boy?’ as pay to download tracks, pocketing a poultry $200,000 in the process (and counting). Does a multi-million dollar career await Dupre in the field of R‘n’B? With lyrics like: “If you wanna take me out after the club, you gotta do it right, baby, show me some love” and “Sex money drugs is what I'm all about / Step your game up so you can see for yourself” and “Brush up against me and whisper in my ear/ Make me feel what you want to feel / Numb to the touch, deeper pulse inside/ Let's hit the dance floor, turn it up inside” we reckon you should go straight down the bookies - NOW - because this girl’s gonna be bigger than a Horses donger! Check out her MySpace! Words: Dave Dryden

Petter and The Pix

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 15:03:54 GMT

Nuts and Bolts: Petter Winnberg (vocals), Andreas Gabrielsson (bass), Nils Tronqvist (drums), Mikael Svensson (synthesizer), Mattias Franzen (guitar), Klas Ericsson (guitar)

Stomping Ground: Stockholm, Sweden since around 2006

Set to Soundtrack: Skipping through a field of cows.

Destined to Upset: If Sting singing ‘I’m an Alien’ to the gentle strum of Jack Johnson and backed by sweet synth madness is your idea of hell, you’ll be down the church faster than a hyperactive hare on M&Ms.

You’re in business if you like: Tweed trousers and Chupa Chupps.

Sweden gave the world Victoria Silvstedt and Neneh Cherry, who can cook a mean Jerk Chicken as well as rap. The Swedes also gave us half of Johnny Borrell’s Razorlight, but we’ll let that one slide; after all, nobody’s perfect. The biggest Swedish export though (other than Ikea) was Abba, with their sweet pop sound and a break-up album in the vein of Fleetwood Mac’s Rumours, where like, the people breaking up recorded together and sang about it. Genius! Anyway, Petter and the Pix are further indication of the Swede’s skill at producing commercial pop. Well, it’s more folk/pop really, a bit like ‘Peter, Bjorn and John’ who happen to come from Stockholm too. Can you see the pattern? Anyway, Petter’s been in quite a few bands over the years and even won the Best Swedish Jazz award in 2000 for his album ‘Far from Alone’ with Linda Svantesson. Then Petter turned into a recluse and headed to the mountains to practise the ancient art of Kung-Fu, returning a far tougher dude and forming new band Petter and The Pix. In 2006 he was introduced to a guy called President Bongo (seriously that’s his name) from GusGus who summoned his Bongolites to produce Petter and The Pix’s debut album ‘Easily Tricked’ on Gung-Ho! Recordings. The album features a pretty diverse range of folk-tinged beats, delving into everything from electro-backed sing-alongs to hazy synths, with a spot of reggae thrown in for good measure. I guess you could say its cuddly folk, the kind you’d use to seduce a young virgin, clad in white from head to toe and sipping a glass of baileys. Anyway, ‘Ol Petter, who started off on bass, is looking forward to breaking the UK scene and test-driving the… erm… talent… “I think the Swedish and UK scenes are similar”, he says. “We’ve been trying to copy you guys for quite some time and have got quite good at it. I’m really looking forward to testing out your live scene. And your ladies”. Check out their MySpace! Words: Dave Dryden

Petter and The Pix release ‘Easily Tricked’ on Gung-Ho! Recordings May 12th 2008.

Welcome to the sex-crazed world of Muddyloop!

Fri, 20 Jun 2008 11:13:35 GMT

Blonde Peterson and Metro Williams, otherwise known as Muddyloop, are a pair of randy Prince enthusiasts with a penchant for 80s, cheese-tinged, electro grooves. A distinct hip-hop, synth-heavy, sexy-electro sound, the kind that makes one want to pull the nearest floozy and have their oh-so wicked way with em’, is the lads’ forte; the knife that butters their bread. Planet Notion caught up with the sex-obsessed cheeky chappies to talk about debut album Flight Night, girl on girl action and, um… she-males?

Tell us, how did Muddyloop come to be?

Metro: Me and Blonde are cousins, so we pretty much grew up together. We clicked from a young age cos’ we both had a warped sense of humour and an unhealthy obsession with Prince. About 7 years ago we bought a drum machine and an 80’s sounding synthesizer and started writing songs to impress girls. That didn’t really work; but by chance, one of our tracks got signed to New York house label, Chez Music, so we had to come up with a name for our outfit.

Blonde: Metro wanted to call us something dumb like ‘Spandex Death’. I came up with Muddyloop cos’ when we started making music our loops were real dirty cos’ we sampled everything from cassette tape. Then everyone would tell us our music sounded muddy; hence the name.

I personally think that your music’s a tad on the cheesy side; but that’s by no means a criticism. It’s infectious cheese - kind of like fungal foot-rot, except it makes you want to spontaneously get into the groove. Was it your intention to make infectious cheesy music?

Blonde: Thanks for the compliment. I guess, to be honest, it wasn’t our intention to make it like this. It’s just our personalities coming through. We just wanted to make music that was fun and not too serious.

Metro: But still kind of fresh and cool. Like myself of course.

Blonde: You love yourself too much! The problem is that people think we’re actually being serious when we sing songs like ‘Hairstyle’ and ‘Girl on Girl’, when in fact it’s all just tongue-in-cheek. We just make sure that we work the groove so that it makes suckers move.

The track ‘I Could Do Things 2 U’ is definitely about the karma sutra or sado-masochism or something, right? Is most of your music and lyrical content of a sexual context?

Blonde: The concept’s a guy letting a girl know that he fucks like Rocco Siffredi.

Metro: Damn man! You’re so crude.

Blonde: We do love the sexual side of things. I guess it’s all those years listening to Prince and watching porn. And the fact that we didn’t actually get much sex growing up cos’ we were strange and geeky. I guess we’re making up for it now in our music.

Metro: Sex is just one side of our characters. We’ve also got tracks like ‘Glamour Magazines’ which talks about everyday modern relationships and a song about the end of the world; there’s even one on the album about a time traveller. There’s a good balance of topics, moods and tempos.

Do you write lyrics for the music or music for the lyrics? And if you write lyrics for the music, surely that means that you see music as more important than lyrical content?

Blonde: Lyrics to the music; always. It’s the music we make that inspires the vocal melodies. Then once we come up with those we start writing lyrics to the beautiful melodies that ooze out our hearts (laughs).

Metro: We see lyrical content as very important. We always try and avoid coming out with lyrics that ain’t really saying anything. Even if we are talking about quirky shit, like on ‘Hairstyle’ or ‘80s Love’, the lyrics still have to be humorous and cool.

Blonde: Me and Metro really take our time over the lyrics and make sure they’re at least better than Usher’s. That’s the minimum standard.

Tell us about the inspiration behind the debut album (Flight Night)? Were you inspired by other artists or does the album tell some kind of story? You know… About a night flying around on the town and all the shit that happens; something like that?

Blonde: I guess the album is a melting pot of everything that inspires us artistically. Sure, it was inspired by other artists - you can blatantly hear the Prince and Michael Jackson influences. But you can also hear the old school hip hop and soul influences on the album too.

Metro: The album doesn’t tell a story, but the title points towards some kind of late night journey through the world of Muddyloop. The production and sound of the album is very 80s influenced. Combining classic 80’s hip hop and soul with synth pop, electrofunk and groove.

Blonde: With catchy songs all over it.

Finally, anything you’d like to add? Some words of wisdom perhaps?

Blonde: Metro needs to bath more often

Metro: Blonde is into she-males

Blonde: Metro’s mum is a she-male

Metro: I think we’ll leave it there.

Muddyloop's debut album, Flight Night, is available now on Muddytrax Recordings. Click here to buy. www.muddyloop.com / www.myspace.com/muddyloop

Words: Dangerous Dave

Bashy chats about Adulthood The Movie!

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 16:21:46 GMT

Gang culture is on the rise in London. Stabbings are becoming more prolific and post codes are sparking turf wars. But rather than the government installing X-ray machines to scan weapons at school entrances, it's films like Adulthood that are likely to have the most effect.

Bashy, the emcee who did the lead single for the film, ‘Kidulthood to Adulthood’, is hopeful that this is the case. He’s all for people approaching their lives more positively.

“The film concentrates on choices you make in life and what kind of path you take. On the street, a lot more is happening but at least it conveys the correct story,” he says.

“Now, my response to all the stabbings is that I’m not as shocked anymore. We as a nation of people are becoming accustomed to it.”

Bashy’s the man behind last year’s ‘Black Boys’ single and this was yet another contribution to encouraging people to raise their game.

“The song’s a celebration of achievement, and it’s not only for black boys. I’ll go and do a show and it’ll just be white kids and then they’re all like brap! White people are struggling, black people are strugging, Asian people are struggling. Especially in London, we’re all in the same community,” he says.

This is represented in Adulthood, which has a multicultural cast – “an accurate reflection of London’s society,” says Bashy. He reckons more films need to be made in this spirit.

“I think a lot of the violence is bred through slavery – people were bred to hate each other,” he opines. “We need to get out of this.”

The film itself is a brutal 24-hour journey through a west London underworld, where director Noel Clarke's dystopic universe offers little to those caught up in the vicious circle he's desperately trying to break. But its brutality puts a mirror up to the proceedings, and this is where its social relevance lies – especially in the current climate.

To recognise that these lives yield little promise, and violence is becoming endemic, is the first step towards healing. www.bashy.com

Words: Helene Dancer

MAN LIKE ME's "sweet as a nut" 60 Second homemade video!

Fri, 09 May 2008 12:33:30 GMT

We asked ‘Man Like Me’ if they could contribute to the 60 Seconds section of Planet Notion. "Hell", we thought, "we’ll give them a wide berth", you know? We told them: “Do what you want, go crazy, let your mind wander.” You see, Man Like Me are creative guys - blending the old-school elements of ska with the new-wave grime scene, an electro-pop backbeat, a smidgen of funk, and a pinch of hip hop thrown into the equation. The results are: "Well fresh!" Anyway, the lads contributed a 60 Second video, sort of in the vein of ‘Oh My Gosh’ and ‘Doughnut’ but with a really, really low budget. We’ll let Man Like Me’s Peter Duffy talk you through it…

“In 60 seconds we decided to each list our personal top ten favourite whatevers. Johnny chose crisps, I chose cartoons and Edwin chose diamonds. Johnny doesn't even really like crisps, I’m being childish, and Edwin is trying to make out like he's in the market for precious stones. Edwin kept his bit to the agreed 20 second length, Johnny went a bit OTT and overflowed at 24 seconds, but I fell short at 16 seconds so it all worked out quite nicely. Most of the items mentioned in each 'top 10' are only there because they rhymed with the previous ones. We used a camera phone for all the pictures even though there was a proper good digital camera upstairs. Safe.” Peter (Check out the 'Man Like Me' MySpace page!)

The Parlotones share photographic memories of Munich!

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 17:28:15 GMT

Planet Notion recently told the world (perhaps we’re being a little optimistic about the scale of our readership) about melody driven (semi)rock band The Parlotones. They’re from South Africa, don’t you know? You can read all about them on the ‘Who the Fuck’ section of the site so we won’t rake up old ground. As Roman poet Juvenal once said “Like warmed-up cabbage served at each repast, The repetition kills the wretch at last”. Bass player Glenn decided to take some photos while the band were supporting the, um, Wombats in Germany, and he’s shared them with us. Isn’t that lovely? He even wrote about it too. Exciting!

“It's a nice, sunny day in Munich. So nice, in fact, that our good friend Adam offers to treat us to a bicycle tour of Munich. He's a tour guide, see? So after each grabbing a bike, our 12-person strong tour rockets off down the streets of Munich, instilling fear into the hearts of the pedestrians and stopping off at historical sites to brush up on our German history. Adam is a great tour guide and has us hanging onto every word. After a ride through a big, beautiful park we stop off at a lakeside restaurant for a pint of beer. Only one though, as drinking and riding is not tolerated in this part of town. After a few more stops and near accidents we head back to the bicycle hold, rack up our bikes, and head off to soundcheck.” Glenn Hodgson – Bassist – The Parlotones